The ladder theory relationship

Ladder theory - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

the ladder theory relationship

An introduction to interpersonal relationship - methods, advice and tips for The ladder theory is a pop psychology explanation by writer Dallas Lynn of the. Ladder Theory explanation and relevance to understanding and learing about human relationships. Here's an interesting concept in the dating world, The Ladder Theory. The ladder theory is ultimately quite simple: men have one ladder, women have two.

As a result of these conclusions, each guy finds a spot on their respective ladders. Being 'Friendzoned' comes in when a guy expects to get off a lady's friendship ladder onto her her relationship ladder.

the ladder theory relationship

While this choice is a subconscious decision one must be aware that this process does occur. Before this point the male does not reside on either of the two ladders because he is not important enough to even consider.

The Ladder Theory

The property of these two ladder classifications that should be clear is the fact that they are two separate classifications with little to no overlap. The main factor that determines what ladder a male is classified into is attraction 2. It is possible for him to become better friends with the female therefore advancing towards the top of the friend ladder, but as the male advances towards the top of the friend ladder the gap between the friend ladder and the lover ladder grows larger.

Because of this, as friendship builds the shock a female will feel when a male eventually confesses his love for her grows in proportion to time. This directly correlates to a male's natural urges to spread his genes to as many eligible recipients as possible.

the ladder theory relationship

Although anecdotal evidence suggests that men enjoy "friends with benefits" on a scale similar to a woman's 'friends' ladder. Women have two ladders - a sexual ladder, and a 'friends' ladder.

The friends ladder is where males who do not make the grade are put - they are more than likely never going to perform a 'ladder jump' and get on the sexual ladder, but will always be given only the friends treatment by the woman. The sexual ladder, of course, is indicative of a woman's more selective sexual behavior and her quest to find a single partner to father her progeny, which also directly correlates to the way females choose to spread their genes.

There is also an area known as the 'abyss'. This is the area where members of the opposite sex go that are determined to be completely unworthy of copulation or friendship.

It should be noted that ladder theory is intended to apply only to the actual act of sexual intercourse, and not to the establishment of a relationship. That comprises the largest problem with ladder theory's applicability.

  • What Is Ladder Theory
  • What Is the Ladder Theory?

Terminology An intellectual whore is a man stuck at the top of a woman's non-sexual ladder; rather than connoting political abuse of scholarship, it connotes the use of platonic, intellectual companionship as payment in lieu of sex.

An intellectual pimp is a woman for whom a man is her intellectual whore. A ninja bitch is an intellectual pimp who realizes that her intellectual whores are attracted to her sexually, and intentionally uses that attraction to manipulate these men.

Ladder theory of sexual relationships

A cuddle bitch is a guy who never gets to sleep with a girl but gets to have intimate moments with her like cuddling, spooning, or otherwise being affectionate. These qualities may be social expectations, pragmatic concerns or nonsexual ideals, depending on the individual and his context. Only the very bottom of the male ladder, in ladder theory, is reserved for women the man has firmly excluded from his sexual interest.

In this model, a man attempts to increase his appeal to a woman by demonstrating the qualities she has indicated that she values in another person stereotypically, these are positive "friendship" qualities such as patience, kindness, helpfulness and consolation. To the male, this is perceived as simply increasing his overall appeal on the single ladder; for the female, however, such behaviour increases the man's rank on the "Friendship" ladder while simultaneously decreasing it on the "Partner" ladder, due to the perceived disparity in criteria between the ladders.

A harsher term for the same scenario is derived from the Woody Allen short story "The Whore of Mensa": Ladder theory suggests that a man who attempts to appeal to a woman through intellectual stimulation or entertainment runs the risk of, rather than becoming or replacing the woman's sexual partner, becoming what Allen satirically depicts as an "intellectual whore" -- someone sought out solely for their intellect, with no interest on the part of the woman in broadening the relationship to other dimensions.

Ladder theory asserts that there is less stigma attached to a woman maintaining platonic friendships with other men outside her primary sexual relationship than the reverse, due to the perceived separation of relationship values on the "ladders", and that this entails a certain degree of hypocrisy -- women are given latitude to maintain multiple relationships to satisfy all their social needs, while men are expected to find satisfaction for all their social needs in a single relationship only.

Ladder Theory's primary assertion in social mechanics is that classic "nice" behaviour in courtship is actually a less productive tactic than might be presumed, and can in fact be counterproductive, as women are presumed typically to infer lack of confidence rather than devotion or good character.

the ladder theory relationship

Ladder theory argues that the most effective tactic is to establish desirability on the "Potential" ladder first and only then to establish high ranking on the "Friendship" ladder, rather than the reverse. The Ladder theory glossary at laddertheory.